.. valentines ..

so it's valentines. i like this holiday, but i have always found it to be a tad over rated. maybe it is cause i don't feel like i need a day of the year to tell my love that i love him. maybe it is cause the commercial world just makes it seem so much bigger than it needs to be, that we have to have roses and diamonds or we will be crushed. i don't really know to be honest. so, over the past 5 years we have been married, valentines has been a 'lite' holiday. we don't do big gifts, i refuse to let him get me flowers and we just be.

so for this year i thought i would list 10 reasons why i love my love..

1. he has the best laugh. we can laugh for hours, usually about childish things that a normal person would find ridiculous but they are hilarious to us.

2. he is a great nurturer. lately with my arm 'issues' i have been a little handicapped and unable to function at 100%. but he is so patient and lets me try and do things and is always there to step in when i can't, which is often.

3. he is a hard worker. he currently holds down 2 part time jobs and goes to school full time. he somehow finds time to be with me, go to the gym and do fun things like drives.

4. he is a great example. he has 4 younger brothers, yep 4. he is a wonderful example to them of what it means to be a man and how to treat girls and be responsible. they will never admit it, but they love him for it.

5. his cute 'guilty' smile. when he has done something and is trying to keep it a secret he makes a little smirk smile that is the cutest thing ever.

6. he is so encouraging of me and my goals and endeavors. he knows that sometimes i need a push and other times i need a break. he just knows what i need and when.

7. he loves animals, especially dogs. he is so sweet with my mom's small dog daisy. she is a crazy thing but she loves him. his parents recently got two cats and he is starting to warm up to them too.

8. he is adventurous and takes me along. he is always wanting to do something new or go somewhere new. he is always thinking about our next trip and where we will go and do there. yes he does have one in mind and it might happen fairly soon.

9. he gives the best hugs.

10. he is the best husband anyone could ask for. he makes me smile daily, and cares so much for me. i know all you think you have it made with your man, but he is my favorite!

so for valentines, we are having a 'bed picnic'. we are getting some yummy treats and having a picnic on our bed while watching a movie. whatever you do today for your love, i hope you have a fabulous valentines.

.. there is light at the end of that tunnel ..

well, it is official. cody is graduating in april. he applied last week and couldn't be more excited. this is a big deal for us, cody is the only kid in his family to graduate from high school with a diploma and now the FIRST to graduate from college.

i couldn't be more proud of him and the work that he puts in to studying and making the most of school. he is an amazing guy, who when he decides he is going to do something he goes for it and wastes no time. he has been studying hard and working for this for a few years, and he is going to be an amazing pilot. so watch out world, there is a going to be a new graduate in your midst in a few short months!

.. thoracic outlet syndrome ..

alright. so i know what you are thinking. what the crap is thoracic outlet syndrome?! i asked myself the same question yesterday.

lately i have been having pain and issues with my left arm and in my neck. i have a headache like 24/7 for weeks at a time. asprin and tylenol pm kind of work but after a few hours it just comes back. stinking sucks. so since i already have a back injury and it felt similar to my lower back i decided to call my neurologist. he sent me for a mri before my appointment, which lets just say was tough. i had a cage on my head, pads all around so i couldn't shift and i couldn't swallow for about 45 minutes. yeah fun.

yesterday was my appointment. i met with him and after looking at my mri and doing a bunch of tests on my arms and shoulders, we discovered two things. i have one bulging disc in my neck, but it isn't pushing enough to cause that pain. so after a few more tests, getting hit with a little hammer in multiple spots.. he concluded that i have thoracic outlet syndrome. i looked at him like he was speaking alien. he is a wonderful doctor and took time to explain it to me and answer my series of ridiculous questions.

basically this is it. you have a nerve bundle {5 nerves grouped together} that run from your spinal cord through your neck, in your shoulder and down your arm. it controls all your motor skills, pain receptors and what not for your arms. i have an extra rib, called a cervical rib, above my top rib. it is being so friendly and squashing my nerves causing the extreme pain, headaches and loss of strength.

{ so the nerves are yellow in the picture, and i have an extra rib above the first one that is pinching it against my collar bone.}

sadly i have experienced all of this - but most recently my loss of strength and motor skills, two nights ago i popped popcorn to watch a movie with cody and i couldn't even open the bag, its paper for crying out loud. so next up is a set of tests for my nerves. i had another x-ray done to see the bone, lovely. and next friday i will be doing a nerve conductivity test. basically then put needle nodes in your muscles and then shock you to see how quick your body responds or if it does at all. i had one done on my legs and it was funny and painful at the same time.

after we get that all settled then is a plan of action. at the moment i have been taken off pain medication and put on a set of steroids and nerve blockers to help get it to calm down to see if i can settle it that way. if it doesn't it is surgery for me. they would cut into my shoulder and remove my rib and stretch the muscles around the nerve so i can function. it sounds miserable. so let us all hope that those pesky nerves decide that medication will work.